When Cows Attack

http://www.popularmechanics.com/outdoors/survival/tips/cow-attack-survival-guide

So it starts out "While the world worries about being eaten alive by sharks, statistics show that far more Americans are killed each year by a more menacing animal. . . ."

(My Mother raises this menacing creature.)
 
full-throttle said:
Dauntless said:
While the world worries about being eaten alive by sharks, statistics show that far more Americans are killed each year by a more menacing animal. . . .
..a guy with a gun

Oh, there's a guy far more menacing that a guy with a gun. Do you know how few murders involve a gun? That most of the residents of death row didn't use guns? England has a higher violent crime rate and NO GUNS! But there is one particular weapon, used in up to 1/3rd of the murders in an average year, that strikes terror in the hearts of law enforcement: No matter how great the numbers in their favor they often shoot the lone NONgunman carrying this one weapon. . . .

http://www.federalobserver.com/archive.php?aid=4082
 
Dauntless said:
England has a higher violent crime rate and NO GUNS!
Yeah yeah I know - "guns for show and bats for the pro"

Oh wait.. could've been "knives for the pro"

Do they even have baseball bats in England? Thought they were into cricket :roll:
 
They can be scary creatures (picture from the past summer).

Just look at the glint in their eyes.
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full-throttle said:
Dauntless said:
England has a higher violent crime rate and NO GUNS!
Yeah yeah I know - "guns for show and bats for the pro"

Oh wait.. could've been "knives for the pro"

Do they even have baseball bats in England? Thought they were into cricket :roll:

Correct - guns for show, knives for a pro - Lock Stock and two smoking barrels.

[youtube]dfX3aXtRbLI[/youtube]
 
Do they even have baseball bats in England? Thought they were into cricket.

Nah - we use the pickaxe handle - just like a baseball bat but widely available (cheap) at every hardware store.
I don't think the cricket bat would be as deadly a weapon as a baseball bat - slower to adjust its trajectory.
And it would be a shame to mess up a good cricket bat with someone's cranium...

England has a higher violent crime rate than US? I find that extremely hard to believe (unless all the US violence ends up in the "murder" category....)
OK I looked it up - violent crime UK is 2x as bad as USA (50 reported incidents/1000). The murder rate is a quarter.
 
I was out on a ride last summer.
Notice the cows happily munchin' away in this field.
Cows grazing.JPG
I stopped to have a puff(one of my relapses :roll: ) & admire the scenery, a dozen cows included.




Warning the pictures you are about to see may haunt you eternally.
The Mad Cow death stare.


Grrrrrr..JPG


Oh oh. Somebody is curious..JPG
Cow 2.JPG

The pack did not like my presence, & sent a couple of the brave soldier cows to investigate me.
View attachment 2


My defense against mad cows is a bit of the Ganja.


What's that smell..JPG

The wind was blowing my smoke straight into the soldier cows snouts.
Notice 1 of the 2 has already got the munchies,
the other she's chronic & enjoying every last minute of the joint.

The moral of the story. :lol:
When faced with mad cows or mad anything, throw a lit joint of the best hydro you can find @ them.
They become rather friendly afterwards.

Ride fast & safe boys.
Unless you've puffed, then slow down & enjoy the scenery.

:mrgreen:
 
Awesome! :lol: You've made my morning :mrgreen:

When I think of cows, I think of the countless Larson cartoons involving cows. Too funny!

Mooo! KF
 
That's not the "We don't like you being there" cow stare. That's the "Hey, this guy looks like he's got pellets" stare. They sent a few to see if you were going to start feeding them. Cows have a one word vocabulary, in english it translates to "Foooooood."
 
Remind me how many cows are eaten by us every year?

An odd accident here and there is a small price to pay for their beef especially given the damage we inflict upon them. 8)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slaughterhouse
 
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