End of the World. Beginning of a new one. The Life of Amberwolf.

Most of us here are just trying to help in what way we know but it's hard to in his circumstance when so far away and when he is being reminded so often of this tragedy, so I think that to take your mind off what happened may be a good thing like go away somewhere or do something that will totally fill your mind with other thoughts may temporarily help
 
dnmun said:
AW doesn't need more adrenalin or onions, he is just depressed from the losses he has suffered and needs to take some antidepressants to stabilize his moods. it doesn't help him for you guys to cook up the ridiculous solutions. it would help if you explained to him why antidepressants are not 'drugs'. he needs help and his hostility from the emotional crisis has damaged the personal relationships he needed to keep going. working up more adrenalin is the last thing he needs. he has already ruined himself overtaxing his emotions with adrenalin and stress.


You need to stop. I'm dead serious. You have absolutely no business telling me or AW or ANYONE frocking ELSE!!! that they need anti-depressants. If I was telling you this in person, I'd be shaking the shit out of you right now. I don't know if you work for a drug company or what but it's disgusting. Those medications are for people that are permanently deranged and even in that case, they are over prescribed and can be more harm than help. It's totally normal for someone to go through some depression and mood swings when they go through a tragedy. It's been proven that exercise is more effective than pharmaceutical medication in treating situational depression and anxiety. Poisonous medication won't make anything that happened go away. Mike already posted his opinions about drugs. Please read them, take them to heart and go do your poison pedaling elsewhere.

Mike does not need happy pills. He needs good friends. He needs time. He needs some dogs in his life again. Mainly though, just time...
 
etriker said:
Ypedal said:
I torrented " xp black edition " it's very easy to find, automated install ( does sp3, codecs, etc etc etc all by itself ) , no key needed.. :wink:

not sure how it would handle a repair load on a pre-existing install however.... but if you start a fresh drive at some point... forget oem's etc..

Xp is near the end and now very easy to validate.


I have copies of XP Black you can get similar for Windows 7 too, I use Eternity Windows 7 myself
WGA is and has been very easy to bypass since it started.

I see lots of excellent advice by many people... anything i would ad would be more of the same
as its sound advice, you simply cant live in the past i went through years of that after
my own life changing tradgedies.
uUnfortunately, AW isn't interested he sees the only fix is getting dogs...right or wrong ultimately its his
life and if he wants to surround himself with dogs so be it...who are we to argue.

Hope you find what your looking for and things start to look up for you..

KiM
 
One of the non western medical treatment is St Johns wort and/or seeping oat straw in a tea. I don't think AW wants to use it anyway, so I will leave it at that.
 
hey AW... just saw this thread, and spent most of an afternoon trying to read some of it.
Sorry to hear mate. I know words often do little to ease the pain but shit... my heart goes out to you mate.

I havent read all the pages (yet) so feel free to shoot this idea down if its already been disgussed (and apologies for reinventing the wheel), but what about camping on site? Atleast then you'll have the opportunity to start adopting a furball and be closer to work right? Your landlord might even like having someone on site for security during the rebuild too. Not sure what the weathers like there but hoping its a viable idea for you.

I've unfortunately got little in the way of advice to offer you mate, I've never really been in a situation of the magnitude this sounds like... but keep your spirits up as best you can, you'll get there eventually. Might seem like a long way off right now, but you'll have dogs and your own roof over your head one day. Just focus on bringing that day closer.
 
Right off the bat, I would have said that the camping thing was a bad idea, but I camped out in the street beside the yard for 7-8 days and the neighbors were all nice and understanding. I don't think I'd want to be in a tent though. If the landlord would take a couple hundred a month for rv parking and electric, you could use the toilet inside and run the rv grey water to the plants in the yard. It might actually work if the rv could be out of the street.

So, Mike, if you think you might want to try that and your landlord is ok with it, I'd be glad to help find you a really cheap but nice place to sleep and hang out and help you get it home. The cheap ones usually need a good carb cleaning which is an afternoon deal but they usually have really low miles. In a way, you'll own your home, and when you get ready to move back into the house, you could just sell it, probably break even or better.....or you could join my rv tribe/cult and go around setting up sustainable campgrounds and teaching businesses about sustainability and ethics.... :wink: Also, dogs love rv's. The small space is like a den to them. ;)

Here's a cool one. Might fit under the carport?
http://phoenix.craigslist.org/evl/rvs/3871317738.html



Just thoughts....

I hope you're having some better days!
 
I found a better one!!!

http://phoenix.craigslist.org/evl/cto/3802915679.html :D :shock:
 

Like the paint.

What are the rules on living in a RV in a residential neighborhood? Does it have to be parked on a paved area? Ask questions.

Arguing with building inspectors is like a hobby for me. Copy of part a letter I am writing today.

"I can find nowhere in the New York State codes that manufacturer recommendations have to be followed. Please correct me if I am wrong."

Is this true? Hows my grammar?
 
you have to use possessive on manufacturer... "manufacturers' recommendations"

from what he has said it may be best for him to stay with his friend bill since being at the house is so depressing for him. i cannot imagine how hot it must be in an RV in the summer in phoenix. i would be sleeping on the ground underneath it to stay cool. it may do more to alienate the landlord too and that is not something he can afford to do with his future there still uncertain. so bringing in dogs while they are working on the house would not help him out of the jam in the long term. too bad there is nobody there with a pickup truck to haul the stuff to the recycling places to clear the yard.
 
I would bet that living in the camper on the property is illegal. Modern city codes. And it will be happening at a time when codes enforcement will be regularly inspecting the place, as the remodel progresses. So not easy to slide by unobserved.

It's gotta suck not having dogs to hug. Uggh.
 
If it's just a van on the property, it isn't setup like a gypsy camp, isn't hooked up to the sewer, etc, there probably wouldn't be any issues. You could tell them that it's there as a cool spot to retreat to/rest on work breaks. They have to prove that not only are you in the van at night, but that you're actually sleeping in it. Whenever I camp somewhere where there's a no camping law, I just sleep in my clothes. On the few times that I've been hassled, I've answered the door quickly, fully clothed. They tell me there's no camping allowed. I ask them to define camping and they always say something like "sleeping in your vehicle" and I tell them that I wasn't sleeping and was just waiting until morning because I don't like driving at night. That's worked every time. If the van is on the property, behind the security fence, they'd need a warrant to come in after the gate is locked. There's so much going on in Phoenix that it's probably a low priority. If they did hassle him, he could take the van over to Bill's for a few days until they move on, then go back. If the van/rv has AC, it could be plugged in at Bills and the dog/s could hang out in there. Worked for me. Again though, just brainstorming.

The only catch about parking it in the yard would the city requirement to be parked on a slab, which is something they could see from the street. The only real option is to find something with an air conditioner that will fit under the carport. That first one I posted might fit?
 
Don't security services set up in some kind of vehicle or van on construction and remodel sites. Just slap some official looking security stickers on it and hit up a costume shop for a security outfit.
 
I don't know Phoenix city codes. In my town, it would be illegal now. But no problem unless codes enforcement is around. I'd just want to check on that before buying a camper is all. Codes will be around as the job progresses. One solution would be to move the camper each time the inspectors get called.

Back in the day, 20-30 years ago, I lived on many construction jobsites with no problems. But it's a new century now.
 
There are always places to park a camper in a city and sleep . One summer I drifted from Los Angeles to Florida and back sleeping in my 19ft camper van the whole time. Two summers later I went from Los Angeles to Florida to New York City and back sleeping in my camper every where I went. Even in NYC (had my van parked in a large parking lot near the Hudson River and would sneak back in at night. :twisted: The trick is finding a quite place and not draw any attention to yourself. No lights, no loud sounds/music etc..

The problem I see with sleeping in a camper in Phoenix in the summer, is the heat. AC is required..... :cry:
 
Been apartment hunting since I last posted, and my stuff packed up till I finished moving in yesterday. New place has no unsecured wifi in range of even a larger-antenna'd Rosewill RNX-N180UBE USB wifi or the X31's built-in wifi, and I'm not signing up for any of the expensive available services in the area ($40+ / month just to connect to the internet? :shock: ), so I have to walk or park within range of the Mcdonalds or one of hte other places in the area with wifi for any internet connection.

Apartments that:

--will take big dogs (St Bernard sized)
--are not more expensive than my house to rent (which is only $775/month for a corner lot with big yard!)
--are not more than 10 miles from my work
--are not in an area full of violent crime
--have at least one path/road to them that I can ride CrazyBike2 on without being run over by insane traffic and/or have to ride at <5MPH because of huge potholes or other horrible road conditions
--haven't got slumlords for landlords
--didn't require a 12month lease (I should be able to move back to my house by end of year)

are kinda hard to find.

I found only one that had a place available before late August or September at the earliest, which wouldn't have helped me much, given my deteriorating emotional state. A couple would have had something by December or January, which would be completely useless. Quite a few might have had something, but never returned my calls (and in some cases emails, too) and were never at the office when i physically came by even when their posted hours showed they should be. (well, a couple of times there was someone there, but they were swamped with lots of people, and I ended up having ot leave before I could talk to them)

But the very first place i found that met the requirements turned out to be the only one, and even had a ground floor place with all tile floors (good both for doggie oopsies if any, and to park CrazyBike2 inside to prevent theft or damage to batteries/etc from heat/sun).


Anyway, once i had the place and lease signed, I arranged to re-visit the St Bernard rescues and see which one of the dogs would work out best. Last Saturday I went up there and Tiny picked herself, reacting to me like she hadn't done with others that had been there to see her over the years (she's been with them for ~5 years, I think it is). So we arranged for her to be brought to the apartment once i was all moved in and when i'd have a couple days off in a row to be there with her, so she could adjust to the new place, and not being with any of the others--i'ts quite a change for her, and none of us knew how she'd react to it.


So far she's doing pretty well, but is still nervous, and a little jumpy at noises and such, especially when we're out walking around the apartment grounds (which I can only do with her early in the morning or late in the evening, as she will overheat very quickly otherwise, plus the ground is pretty hot for her little paws).


Mostly she prefers sleeping on the cool tile floor, but she did snuggle up in the bed a couple of times last night before she got too warm and went back to the floor after an hour or two, each time.

She's pretty independent, but definitely wants attention when she asks for it. If I approach and she rolls over, it's belly-rub time, and if I'm not getting the right spots she'll wave a front paw to let me know. She's not as drooly as some, but she does have a little bit. And not a lot of loose fur when I brush her (which she needs every day, at least)--less actually than Bonnie the border collie always had. She doesn't really slurp kisses either, though she will sniff noses a little, and nuzzle. She doesn't paw at me either.

She either doesnt' yet know a lot of commands or else just doesn't yet feel comfortable enough to respond to me, or else I haven't figured out all her signals yet (well, that's definitely true--she's got a different body language than most of the dogs I've had before, but she is actually closer to Bonnie like that than any other). She walks on a leash well, though I'm still working with her on leaving it loose and not walking too fast for my gimpy gait.

So far she hasn't barked at anyone or anything, either, and hasn't actually tried to chase the numerous cats in the area while we're out walking, though she definitely would like to if she wasn't on a leash, she hasn't pulled to try to do it.


As for me, I'm feeling MUUUUCH better with her here; it's almost like some huge weight has lifted off of me just knowing she is right there, even if she's not in the room with me--heck, even knowing she is going to be there when I get back from McDonalds (where i'm posting this from real quick, before I go back to see how she's doing without me there, after being there 24 hours).

I*am* a little anxious about being away from her, and I do feel a little anxiety about her being there alone, since i don't even know the place myself yet very well, having only been here a day myself before she arrived. But so far neither feeling is overwhelming, and I don't feel like I'm going to explode or cry or die, which is how I have felt quite a lot before I moved in and she arrived.


I don't know how things at work will be, because I'll be nearly an hour away from her then, instead of right across the street, but I'll just have to see about that and deal with it as it happens.


I didn't have the horrible nightmares last night, or during any of my little naps during the day today, so that's a good sign. I did still have some bad dreams, but they were all related to the actual move and the change in "home" I'm going thru, and didn't star dogs on fire or anything like that, which is what my usual nightmares are about.


So, for now, things are going ok, although I won't be on the web much until I can figure out a way to get wifi connection at the apartment itself.
 

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She's awesome! So happy for you!
 
Boy Howdy. Looks like you are getting things under control. We all know how tough it has been on you, and, some were a little testy in posting, but, you have one hell of a family on the E-s, and everyone is looking for your improved outlook and less stress.

Good deal on getting a place and a companion. 8) 8) 8) 8)
 
She's a beauty! So glad you got a place of your own where you can get another dog. She's going to do more to heal your emotional wounds than any human could.

I'm soooo glad to hear this. Take it easy as you can now, till time to move back into the house. We'll take care of the sphere for awhile, you just take care of your new dog.
 
Sounds like you have a good handle on things Amber! Tiny has got to be happy to finally have a real home and a loving master. Wishing you all the best!
 
That is great news, AW! Congrats on your new puppy, sounds like she is just what you needed. :D
 
I am glad to read you are sorting out your life AW.

This forum isn't the same without you, your participation seems invaluable in my mind. If I understand the situation correctly, there is likely some passworded wifi nearby. I imagine if you go knocking on doors with 5-10 dollars in hand, someone will share their internet with you. If you don't want that or find yourself unsuccessful at this task, a directional wireless antenna would give you pretty great range. To illustrate, think of an omni directional antenna as a spray bottle on mist and think of a directional antenna as a spray bottle on jet. You may be able to convert your wifi adapter to a directional antenna fairly easily. Search phrases like 'cantenna' or 'directional antenna conversion' and so on may be of help.
 
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