Buying forest land, implementing solar

[DAND214]

SWBLUTO said/; Anyway, RV is definitely getting on the drive tomorrow.

When have we heard that? Multiple time and it's still not there.
If you would stop trying to teach how to suduce a woman, this mansion could of been done by now!

So how deep is that well gonna be? If not mistaken my well is 195ft deep,
While you are at digging, why don't you dig up a septic field, your gonna need it too.

Dan

 

[swbluto]

SWBLUTO said/; Anyway, RV is definitely getting on the drive tomorrow.

When have we heard that? Multiple time and it's still not there.
If you would stop trying to teach how to suduce a woman, this mansion could of been done by now!

Well, I keep chickening out because I see the RV falling off the driveway and being forever irrecoverable (And... the RV has my bed, lol). But, now it's a forced issue since the post holes will be dug fairly soon, and the RV needs to go on before the gate posts are set.

Seducing a women... lol... my, I never would've considered myself a guru, lol. But... wow... women definitely seem to be falling at my command lately more than they did historically,when I'm "doing well" anyways. That was actually kind of freaky seeing I had such control over her emotions in such ... unexpected and kind of hard to understand ways. It's like I inadvertently tripped some instinctual program that highjacked her emotions and sent her in massive overdrive ("lost control", instinct taking over).

I emotionally highjacked the shit out of her, lol. The thing is I've never really read that from anywhere, the compulsion just came naturally.

Mansion is going to take a couple of years to save up for. If I'm lucky, less than 5. If I'm really lucky, less than 2.

So how deep is that well gonna be? If not mistaken my well is 195ft deep,
While you are at digging, why don't you dig up a septic field, your gonna need it too.

Dan

As deep as it needs to go. I'm going to have the ability to dig up to 28 feet and I'm thinking the water level should be less than 20 feet, but I will see. It seems like the water level is deeper during the hot summer months.

And contrary to popular belief, I do not shit in the woods. That's just disgusting. I tried doing it for a lack of better technique for the first week I was here, but seeing the fungus growing on it really freaked me out, so I stopped doing that and now I dispose of it properly.

 

[Dauntless]

. . . . the things I talk about on this thread and how I act in real life in front of people I care about are two ENTIRELY DIFFERENT THINGS, lol. Ok, good that we got that clear, lol. Theory and application are two different fields, lol.

Does that mean you DON'T call Chalo a bitch in front of him? I'll believe that when you head on down to Austin and behave yourself in the bike shop.

Sighing about your person. Yeah, sometimes when they just CAN'T get rid of a guy. . . . I mean, I've heard them sigh at OTHER guys they wanted to get rid of. Maybe one of them was YOU.

I take it your '37' was an assumed median for home buying, not your age. How nice to wait that long and not get pushed into it at 20 so you can take in your older brothers and sisters. While I don't agree that it's not a 'Home' until you have a 'House' on it, there's definitely no comparison to a chart with conventional single family dwellings you should be making. You would have to compare youself to people who have bought themselves empty lots and just down whatever with it. In Los Angeles it's considered that in the near future it'll be rare that someone under 40 would buy a house.

So how about if you start out with a Yurt: This company sold one to this family I was reading about for a little over $1,000.

Once you start bringing the women to that eclectic abode you can be showing off the slow but steady progress on the more permanent but equally out there microhome.

 

[swbluto]

I'm pretty sure the homeownership stats are including mobile homes, and that's essentially what I'm living in at the moment. I guarantee once the thing is on blocks, the county (if I so chose), would recognize it as a permanent dwelling and consider it permanent residence. I see that similar property on the GIS maps have done exactly that (Improvements valued at $1000, yep, that box like thing is or was once an RV.). So, technically, I already fulfill the criteria for comparability. But, that's beside the point. I can't be compared to masses at the slaughterhouse giving away over half their lifetime earnings to the financial overlords because I refuse [They still do that via loans for mobile homes; Buffet making good money on that in his mobile home holdings]. In similar vein, I refuse to do functionally similarly by way of rent [There are possible exceptions] if it can be avoided. By the time the median person of my generation is signing a 30 year mortgage (If they are), lord willing, I'll already own a more directly comparable home to the "median home" free and clear to my name. Anyway, I'm just looking into my crystal ball at the moment... my soothsaying has not always been known to be accurate... honda didn't quite last at least a year, lol... I think the only truth I'm getting in regards to gasoline engines is can you count on huge problems sooner than you expect, lol.

I half think that a good percentage of the 40 year old home owners of my generation will be inheritances, not earned whatsoever.

I've never called chalo or anyone here names. If I've done anything, I might've have insinuated somethings in defense, but almost always skillfully indirectly and only when deserved. I was referring more to ... certain expressed beliefs that are more spur of the moment and reflect some passing feeling, moreso than underlying rocksolid perceptions that actually stick around in reality.

Revisiting the sighing. I'm really sure I'm not misreading that. She wouldn't have tried as hard as she did to 'get me back' if she merely wanted to get rid of me, lol. And, the undeniably mutual happiness/excitement towards the end agrees with the dreamboat interpretation. But I do see sighing can indicate relief, but that's not the same kind of sighing. That was definitely the dreamy sigh and not the relief sigh, the former has an upward and then downward sloping melodic curve, the latter is just downward. See... I had evoked some powerful intoxicating feelings deep within her that she probably hasn't experienced before, so you can get bet she'd want to keep me around.

Surprisingly enough... that situation... unfolded precisely how I can imagine an anime would. Granted, animes tend to be more immediate... and don't quite have the initial defenses and 'omg so hott' instaneous reactions preceding it... but the end result was pretty much the same. Girl falls madly in love with guy.

I'm thinking if I need to, I'll go ahead and create an 8x12 wooden 'house' and integrate it into the mansion later. I would want a wooden home for the winter, easier to heat with a wood stove. 8x12 is actually perfectly fine space for a bedroom (The shed works out fine as it is, though it doesn't have a bed in it), so it'd work out.

 

[swbluto]

Okay, was making final preparations for the move this morning, and was visualizing the plan before finishing up the final hard-to-reverse preparations, and I just realized that it was not viable. The RV would be sticking too far out into the road, making a second adjustment impossible with the van (Not enough for the room for the van on the road stretching across it.), and this could not be pulled off without a second adjustment since there's not enough room (Going back and forth) to refine the approach. So, essentially, my RV is stuck on the road, lol.

This makes for some interesting problems in the possible near-term. So, I'm thinking I want a habitable structure on the property ASAP, not just for legal reasons, but to get me on my property inside the fence, lol. Getting lockdowned in the RV on the road introduces some interesting scenarios I don't want to experience.

So this means I'd be willing to entertain smaller structures for the sake of speed. To fund this pursuit, I'll need to sell off assets ASAP. Once I get the structure built, I can then sell off the RV, though it works well for its current purpose.

Anyway, I'm going to stop buying from the local grocery anything other than strictly the 'standard items'. They seem to have a habit of jacking everything up and I just grudgingly accepting it as a learning opportunity, so no buying fruits, no "add ons", no "Extras", just like the airlines, they rip you off as much as they can on the little things. Buying the bananas blasted through my going-out-to-eat budget for the week, so I'm not buying from them anytime for the next 6 days or so. If I need salt and protein, either eat some peas or eat some fish.

Anyway, the straightup cocoa tasted great this morning.I do sometimes wonder why. whatparticular micronutrient did it havemy body really wanted and why?

 

[swbluto]

Now I'm going to need to secure the RVonthe road while I'm gone. Wonder how I could disable/lock up my wheels without too much expense...

That's the fear, being gone 10 hours a day 5 days a week introduces opportunity for the RV to be pulled away and definitely ransacked at a minimum. I'll probably get the valuable equipment out of here, though the shed seems like a poor alternative. The lock is laughably easy to break. I could get a padlock installed on the shed doors I think for better security.

Need to disable/lock the wheels...

Maybe I'll get one side on blocks...

Seems like it'd invite harassment, especially by authorities, so maybe I'd get the less visible side on blocks...
the
Lifting up one side of the RV for removing the wheel and installing blocks... What kind of jack would I need? Would I be looking at a farmjack? I guess if I got everything loaded on the otherside, I could probably use my 2 ton carjack, would definitely need an elevated platform for the carjack to rest on. Maybe I could use a cheap jack to hold up the axle instead of getting blocks.

Man,lotsof security details Ineedtofinish up for leaving duringtheday forextended periods of time.

Fence, improve shed security, disable an RV wheel.

Sales aren't looking too bad, that's good. I guess late july was "the slow period" this year; wonder why the effect was so severe this year? Did that news article really scare people?

 

[Dauntless]

Can't see this RV you're trying to jack up, but:

It's a normal thing that there's an A arm, a solid axle housing, SOMETHING that you can slip the floorlift under just behind the wheel. Easiest way to get the wheel high enough to just take it off. Which you don't really need to do. You can put a block under the arm, etc,, the tire then protects the brakes behind it. Block both sides of the drive wheels, but don't block just the left or or right side. But I can't imagine anyone taking it off to ransack it, they can do it just fine right there if they're sure you're not on the way back.

 

[swbluto]

Thanks for the advice. Block the wheels, good idea.

Anyway, stopped by HD to pick up the 5' pipe for the auger, and stopped by HEB since I was there. (needed some PB and bananas)

And... after that visit... I felt like playing this song, lol:

[youtube]2uneYz201p0[/youtube]

Half the man I used to be... CHECK
Yesterday... CHECK
She's gone... CHECK

Anyway, found out that the high schools start this week and weird, none of the staff at HEB right now are in highschool as far as I can tell. The person talking to me was in her later 20s (Anyway, felt like I was grating with her... sharing all her bad news... the yiddish proverb, beware the man telling of bad news but sharing none of his good fortunes.), and I just suddenly realized...

This girl was probably a junior or sophomore in high school.

I was /really/ questioning her age after hearing the baby response, and my worst suspicion was that she was still in high school. The girl sympathizing earlier with my picking of those heavy trees, I was also questioning how old she was when she did that, lol.

Anyway, that would actually give a lot of context to the situation.

There are tremendous peer pressures in high school that girls especially are susceptible to. One of the most common being, "I need a boyfriend", which might really explain her behavior, the exact kind of behavior I might have specifically fell for.

Anyway... wow... she left me hungry. Like, a wolf who tastes blood for the first time, I'm hungry for love, lol. I almost feel like I need to find someone to replace her, not necessarily right away, but definitely pursue that direction. I feel like she gave me a glimpse into an alternate reality, like one I might have known at times in the distant past, but not ever fully realized existed to that extent. I can't say that definitely, I was definitely experiencing it in certain parts of my teens, but recent memories by their nature are far stronger than distant ones. And, I never was that bold in advancing on anyone, and never was the depths therein ever that deep.

Anyway, I know, get over it. I will in due time, lol.

Wow, there was only one other time I've cried this hard, and thought maybe I was feeling hopeless because of poor sales. But, no, I definitely don't feel like that now: Sales are fine now, but holy shit, the tremendous experience of loss that I now have no real hope of fully reversing triggered the waterworks.

Anyway, thought earlier if might be good time to engage in one of the "Deaths of despair"': Opiates. Try avoiding the death, lol. Anyway, that doesn't really doesn't fit in my budget and even if I wanted to, seeing the DEA agents racing through here and busting major pot growing operations in the area, makes me think I shouldn't be doing anything like that, lol. The eyes are on this place, lol. Anyway, just a passing thought I'm not seriously entertaining, lol. If this was Washington, I might not be against growing pot... but this is Texas, laws are different here, lol.

Anyway, sans those particular thoughts... yep, progressing later today. And I need to start business ops.

 

[Harold in CR]

Ever think about a front bumper mounted ball hitch ? Heavy angle bolted through the bumper and mount the ball. That way, you can SEE what you are doing, and get quick response on turning.

 

[swbluto]

Ever think about a front bumper mounted ball hitch ? Heavy angle bolted through the bumper and mount the ball. That way, you can SEE what you are doing, and get quick response on turning.

That's a good idea but I would still would run into the issue of "Not enough room for a sharp turn". Now if a powerful ATV or a smaller tractor had a small hitch on the front, now that'd be an idea.

Anyway, saw that there was a farm nearby.

Started wondering... could I realistically subsist off their crops?

I'm thinking about the scenario where the vehicle is permanently destroyed and I need to eat and the local grocery is inadequate. i wonder if I could realistically purchase produce from the nearby farm? I feel like giving them a call.

 

[swbluto]

Will I get over it... hmmmm.... I recognize there was a 'strong bond' (reciprocation and ... basically a strong unspoken agreement... like... we both found our soul mates and shook hands... I want to think I'm just kidding myself... and I'm mistaking something that's really simple and disposable for something far deeper... but it is hard to just 'forget about'.) between us that will be mentally hard to break. So, probably not right away... but... I'm sure I will eventually move on, I will have to regardless but she definitely seems like she'd be hard to forget.

I was earlier thinking of the phrase "plenty of fish" and I found it utterly repulsive. At one time, sure, I might have agreed that there's millions of people out there and that you just have to find them, but it feels like it completely disregards the value of something that should otherwise be held in special regard, which I understand is the intention so current soul searchers aren't losing hope, but it shouldn't. I don't think I previously had this perspective because I never found anyone like that, 'someone special'.

Anyway, it's been about 1.5 months since I last saw her. It's understandly close enough to be thought of as something incredibly relevant and important, especially given its very rarely seen intensity, but I'm sure time will eventually resolve that. Feels like I'm going through the classic steps of the grieving process, lol.

I feel like one of these boring nights, I'll probably post a personals ad on craigslist, a vain attempt to recontact her. I don't realistically expect I'd find her that way, lol, but I kind of thought, what do you have to lose? lol. One of those questions I asked myself right before I acted as boldly as I did... what do you have to lose? lol.

Anyway, I think I acted the way as boldly as I did, not necessarily because "how I was feeling at that time", but because I recognized I would be passing up what was otherwise meant to be, at least as far as my nagging suspicions at the time were telling me. Anyway, I don't necessarily believe that... I understand it's "just a feeling"...

It's funny how my "just a feeling" turned out to be so incredibly right at the time.

But how I was feeling probably did play a role. My income was higher then and income does change how I'm feeling about myself... how close I am to achieving certain goals... how I compare to my peers...

Gee, I can add the "i'm better than you" stare to the possibility list, lol.

That was definitely an underlying thought at the time, acting as judgmental as she was.

I wouldn't ordinarily think that look would induce a pseudo-orgasm, though, lol.

But with girls liking higher status males... it might have that effect.

Let's see... what might have been the underlying meanings...

"Why the hell did you move to this pissy town?" (Translation, "you're a piece of scum")
"So I could do this this this" (Followed with the adamant better than you look) (Translation, "I'm better than you, and you know it")
Girl then swoons and falls in love. Guy successfully defended against her attempts to bring him down the ladder and proves he's better than her; girl in turn falls for the male asserting his higher status.

Maybe it was a status thing. From the way she comported herself to her happiness and optimism, I could infer she was a high status female in her world. Then from the defense against status attacks and assertion thereof, male asserts higher status. Anyway, I'm guessing... I don't get the sense that guys really care about it BUT maybe they really do, it just works differently among females. It shows up in their emotions and comportment. It also works in the comportment of males, but ownership of status symbols /might/ also have a stronger affect as well as their active defense and assertion of status. ("Posturing")

 

[Dauntless]

No no, the woman doesn't think it's the stare that makes her better than you. She thinks she's better than you because she's a woman

As for a woman you saw walk by and imagined all sort of things that never happened, 1.5 months means 'Disappeared into the mists of time.'

 

[swbluto]

No no, the woman doesn't think it's the stare that makes her better than you. She thinks she's better than you because she's a woman.

I wonder how much culture has to do with this. I doubt women in muslim societies believe they're better than the males, lol. I suspect by extension more patriarchal societies don't have this issue as much as more "diverse/tolerant" societies. Regardless of society, posturing by males is undoubtedly influential in this regard.

Into the mists of time, lol, I like it.

It feels like a more distant memory now than it was yesterday. I suspect maybe I've been distancing my mind from it, suppressing it, for it now triggers grief. It just feels like it... doesn't seem like there's really any other reason why it would be less strong. I was obviously replaying it, keeping the memory alive throughout the weeks. But, now it doesn't seem like I am. (Which seems like a bummer, it was a rather enjoyable memory. Oh well, thank goodness I've extensively documented it here, lol.)

Like sands through the hour glass, so do the days of our lives. She'd repeat that, enjoying herself, that one girl back in nuke school.

Anyway... with this change in mind in regard to her... I wonder how my special moments will be affected? I guess I'll find out eventually, lol. Definitely not feeling like it today, think a tinge of depression has been hitting recently, the tiredness today has been inexplicable(Can't trace back to lack of physical activity, inadequate nutrition or any of the known triggers.)

It's been spitraining tonight, so didn't continue with the well like planned.

Business has been picking up, definitely need to try the new method of using the champion generator to increase production, see if it'll work. Otherwise, I will have to figure something else out for the increased workload.

I'm guessing the last half of july might've seen slow sales because of back-to-school shopping. I can't seem to confirm that school starts here in early august this week, but the calendar I'm seeing "suggests" it. I get the sense, my customer base is mainly mothers, so this might help explain it.

Anyway, got hackers locking me out of my own site, lol.

Yep, I'm thinking I need to be more active in site backups.

She was interesting. I look at all the 20+ year old cashiers working the HEB line, and I'm not seeing anyone who acts anything like her. She was... different. She had an airy way of speaking, her behavior seemed flighty. I've literally never seen a girl like her in this area. I suspect we clicked as we did not because she was merely horny and flirty, but because she was a spitting image of myself in terms of personality, a mirror. Anyhow, it's a mere suspicion. A strong suspicion at times. I get a grating sense or blase sense with lots of people, even when I feel like I'm "doing well" (tends to be more blase than anything), but we seemed to click fast. [Granted, I would not have done that biting my hand "Omg, you're so sexy" if she wasn't flirting, lol.]

It does help being in her own protected world, not exposed to the costs of the real world, she's not been tinged as much as older females by money. I don't know if there's something about money driven society that changes people, but it almost seems like she and her friend had a carefreeness about them that almost no adults don't that seems rooted in a lack of exposure to real world living expenses, not just merely the fact they're younger. Anyway, it was refreshing seeing she didn't seem to be as focused on money as older females tend to be, seemed to be more rooted in their core personalities, untinged by money. It makes me wonder if people in native south american tribal societies, with this lack of concern for money, just merely subsisting, also have a more carefree people. Might be part of what makes them healthier; they're psychologically healthier for reasons more than being a coastal people.

 

[DAND214]

I know college starts in August, but doubt High school does. At least it's that way here. So do you think a High School kid should be hookin up with a old man? Might not be good for business.

So what's it been, 3 months or is it more? Since you started the RV move. Get some help, so you can get it done.

Dan

 

[swbluto]

I know college starts in August, but doubt High school does. At least it's that way here. So do you think a High School kid should be hookin up with a old man? Might not be good for business.

I'm not suggesting that highschoolers should be hooking up with older men, but I believe people should be hooking up with their psychological peers (self-same people), the kind you have deep connections with. If they happen to be younger and by chance you happen to meet them, that's just the way the dice rolls. A century ago, it was not uncommon for 33 year old men to marry 14 year old girls.

Granted... I'm aware of the tendency of younger females to be more attractive probably due to reasons relating to genetic quality, so I can't say that's not an influential factor, but I'd like to think we were mental peers (self-same people) and not just her being a hot young thing, lol. I personally did not think she was attractive until well after we interacted, so I was obviously attracted to "her personality". She looked pretty when she genuinely smiled, but I think that's mostly universally true. Genuine Smiles = attractive.

Anyway, I didn't know she was in highschool at the time of meeting her, but I definitely was questioning it after the baby noises she made, and it seems like I've recently confirmed it (none of the HEB staff looked that young). I was thinking that since the other highschooler that summer I met was a senior, she was also previously a senior, meaning she was either 18 or 19 and so no legal problems there, but I'm now strongly suspecting she was a junior. Either that, or she's shipped off to college. Or she got fired for flirting too much with the customers, lol. [Maybe she found her knight in shining armor and quit; she was looking for someone.]

 

[Dauntless]

He doesn't KNOW she's in high school, he's just HOPING.

 

[swbluto]

He doesn't KNOW she's in high school, he's just HOPING.

I'm HOPING NOT, lol. The idea she's in high school puts her in the "untouchables" category which isn't exactly what I was hoping for, lol.

The thing is I may have been precisely attracted to her because she was still in highschool, not because she was young, but she hadn't yet been exposed to the cruel world out there and the corrupting affect on her personality.[Granted, that's a little suspicious... seems like the "real world" starts at 13 years old for lots of people, lol.]

Anyway, wow, just checking out some of the things on this page I'm looking at...

Wow, that must've been f'ing rare. I wonder how many girls even experience that in their lifetime?

I'm thinking most people who've progressed to the stage I've reached asked for the girl's number, probably even well before then, lol.

Now I'm starting to wonder if she was having some kind an orgasm...lol.

Jeez... now I'm reading again, and it sounds like a passionate love story you'd read in a romance novel, lol.

http://www.buzzle.com/articles/physical-attraction.html

He will try to catch your attention by giving you one of those longing stares. The kind of stare that will melt you right then and there.

Maybe that was it, longing stare. That feels like the operative emotion at the time, but it was a bold, impassioned stare unlike these stares I see in google images.

Anyway, I found it was actually 1 month and 6 days ago, so not really /that/ long ago.

I'm really trying to find this song I'm thinking of, I really have no idea who sings it and I don't remember any identifying phrases in the song. It's a guy, though, that sings it. It's definitely more word-centric than melody-centric (Not likely trance; doesn't feel like trance). Definitely seems like it was a popular song at one time. Ruled out modest mouse.

Seems like I'm having a tough time just forgetting it, despite just declaring it abandoned yesterday and despairing at the thought, I can tell this morning I'm still not losing hope however vain, lol.

I remember once taking so much joy(?) in thinking about or renacting that particular moment, but now I feel anything but joy, lol. If it persisted long enough, might be diagnosable as severe depression, lol. I wonder if in a different life I would feel any different, such as having the reassurances of family and friends, but no, I'm pretty darn positive it'd be exactly the same. Maybe in a certain life, a girl would console me and then reveal her long concealed desire, perhaps that would change things, lol. But, that undoubtedly would be a rare life. Seems like that's something that would happen more often in reverse, guys staking their claim and moving fast on a recently broken up girl.

That moment where you could see it in her face, how her heart had melted, let's say, and you somehow knew she was yours.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=heart%20melt

Basically the heart orgasim. When your heart feels like someone is grabbing it and twisting it but it feels really good. When it feels like your heart is so pumped and energized but the rest of your body wants to collapse to the floor and all you wanna do is be with that person who is making your heart feel that way.

Suspicion confirmed, lol. She was having an orgasm, and it was sustained in a way you'd think most heart melts wouldn't be. She definitely looked like she was ready to fall to the floor with how violently shaking she was. And you can tell with the way she was talking, she was pleading "Please love me, please, please, please.", poor little thing. I granted her request and she was ecstatic and elated, and she sighed dreamily in her final farewells.

It's funny, too, my grandparents had been predicting I would breaking many a heart. And looking back, yeah, that's probably true when I really think about it, even if I might historically think otherwise, lol. Lots of girls flirting with me, falling over themselves while walking by, I flirting with them, I just never really pursued any of them that intensely like I did with her. I'm not really sure what's different now... territory... i'm actively chasing and fulfilling my dreams...the fact that you rarely see most people more than once, so there's that pressure to never leave a situation asking "What if?", emboldening you. There's definitely something different about my person compared to my same-age peers here, they seem like they lack balls, lol, so I don't think I could ascribe it to my age.

 

[swbluto]

Anyway, it was interesting what kind of affect meeting her had. I suddenly became extra motivated and ambitious.

I've heard quotes like "Behind every great man lies a great woman", and I've seen suggestion that married men outperform single men on measures of income, and I didn't really understand the whys. I thought maybe women chose the higher income males, or higher income males had a tendency to pursue marriage more often than lower income males. Which might be all true but, after that experience, I can confidently say it's definitely because you become motivated/ambitious to a large extent."Life" courses through your veins and empowers you.

Anyway, after a little bit of Broken Heart Syndrome since yesterday and this morning (Could feel in the lethargy, the weak palpitations from a weakened heart, compulsion to sleep, lack of appetite) I'm feeling pretty much OK right now. Just a stable low energy level kind of state, placid. Thinking of it no longer triggers great pleasure or great sadness, at least not at the moment. Might be different in the morning times, lol, but otherwise feeling stable at the moment.

Right now is a great time to use the auger. Not raining yet heavily overcast as if it will, kind of cool outside. Weather.com predicts it'll start at 6.

Update: Yeah right, using the auger right now sucks, whole bunch of muddy clay that just won't come out of the auger. Makes me wonder if this "well water" will be more mud than water?

Oh well, even if it is mud, sand/gravel filters should still get water.

 

[swbluto]

I can't get over that "melted heart" face. i don't know what was driving it, it almost had a tinge of sadness to it, and I'm not sure if she was reflecting my emotions or moreso her own. Or maybe I'm entirely misreading it. Whatever it was, you could definitely tell some intense emotion had taken ahold. Eventually, it started looking like she was in shock, lol. I was like "Oh my god, what am I really doing to this girl? Maybe I should stop...", lol.

Anyway, I think I'm going to start getting the fence post holes in. This well seems to be a slow ongoing project.

And the popo just drove by. Hmmm... a visit from the sheriff is a situation I'm trying to avoid and I'm ill-prepared for that currently

https://theblazingcenter.com/2017/02/happiest-moments-tinged-sadness.html

Happiest moments have a tinge of sadness. Hmmm...

Maybe it's more like the most beautiful moments are tinged by sadness.

Yes, that's what it looked like... it almost looked like she was experiencing a moment of overwhelming beauty.

n moments of great overwhelming beauty sometimes we cannot help but feel both a great joy and a great sadness. Why? Because it’s as if in that moment our hearts are awakened and we finally feel the full longing we push down deep within ourselves. The longing bursts out because it sees a glimmer and glimpse of what we long for, only to find it not yet fully fulfilled.

Profound. A glimpse... I've described it just like that, a glimpse. So she was reminded of a long suppressed unfulfilled longing, thus the sadness.

 

[Dauntless]

I just can't get all this over a clerk saying "We're out of that."

Imagine if there really was a reason to make a big deal over her.

[youtube]nK9H2owUQQ8[/youtube]

 

[swbluto]

Honestly, I'd think there really is no real reason why a big deal should be made out of her, I have actually lots of reasons as a disinterested observer would observe why that'd be the case, lol. But, clearly my person thought she was attractive enough to make a move on, and she /was/ mine at the time, so there's clearly something I saw in her that maybe I'm not explicitly counting as a reason that actually matters most. It's hard to explicitly infer "She'd make great children", but I have a strong feeling that's what drives much male-to-female attraction, even absent a desire for children and instinct likely excels at this task where reason may fail. The fact she was advertising might also factor into that.

And... really... there was... a lot experienced then I've never seen before... a special moment... that I may have not really considered important at the time (Actually I did, but still)... really grew on me.

I still seriously can't get over that melted heart face, "overwhelmed by beauty", tinged by sadness look. It was like she was freaking experiencing a once in a lifetime event, just as I was.

Anyway, I thought it was interesting, the idea that resources are allocated according to status, and during time of "low resources", the highest status members who got 'first dibs' were the most likely to have resources for them and their dependents, thus driving status-seeking behavior among females. It's interesting, because I noticed that there wasn't a lot of females of childbearing age in this neighborhood, and I thought maybe it was because it was an older crowd in this general area but... after she really cast a black eye to this area where she presumably lives, I started to wonder if area is a primary driver in conventional female mate selection ("where do you live?"), and that might be why I don't see many children-bearing capable women here (pre-menopausal home-makers, if you will). It's an interesting part of Houston, rather lowly populated, but offers pretty good advantages in terms of proximity. I suspect it is unpopular, but distance from the center and lack of lakes could be a factor. And it kind of looks like it. I personally don't think it looks that bad, and I've certainly seen worse just about everywhere in the west, but I suppose it doesn't stand a candle to the memorial/west-houston area where the wealthier 45+ year olds live.

I suspect the general trend is that older people tend to be in the periphery (50+ miles from center), younger people cluster more towards the center. That might be why I don't see a lot of child-bearing females here... the better jobs for the younger folk are more towards the center...

Anyway, cell charger died, couldn't charge my internet phone, it died. Luckily, I was able to find another one and it works now. I was despairing waking up after 2 hours of sleep with symptoms, "Man, I can't call anyone my phone is dead.", lol.

 

[Dauntless]

Honestly, I'd think there really is no real reason why a big deal should be made out of her, I have actually lots of reasons as a disinterested observer would observe why that'd be the case, lol.

Meanwhile your posts on the subject say "To Infinity---AND BEYOUND!+"

[youtube]-SRu_anT0PU[/youtube]

 

[swbluto]

Obviously I'm not a disinterested observer, lol. I actually talked to her and all that.

 

[swbluto]

The "heart melt" face, with the overwhelmed by beauty, tinged by sadness, I can definitely now sense longing in that first second or two when it started. Like a wish she had always wanted granted.

Anyway, I'm just making sure none of my perceptions go unwritten as I will likely eventually forget most of it. But, maybe...



Feeling a sense of brewing optimism this morning, bounding with energy, wow, did that suddenly take a fast turn. Still not quite over the idea of forever not seeing her. It's not even the idea that she's taken or even if I'm in a position to take her that really matters; it feels like a loose end that remains untied (And really needs some tying... lol). I did not intend my ending statement to be taken as it were, but as insurance against the risk unforeseen circumstances would intervene to keep us apart.

In other news, getting post holes done and trash taken out today, then sometime soon, I'll be setting the posts in concrete. Then it's time to stake in the t-posts, and then start applying the fence and complete the gates (Vehicle gate, back gate). Then final security upgrade preparations (shed, RV) and I should be good to go.

I can definitely tell with my monotone voice recently, I'm just a little depressed. I'm not sure if I'm almost always like that though... I'm pretty sure I wasn't, way too enthusiastic about certain activities.... lol.

Definitely feeling this beat now:

[youtube]HuS5NuXRb5Y[/youtube]

I think the weather might be getting to me. Been heavily overcast and raining/drizzling for the last 3 days, what good timing, lol. It does seem like the less sunny days have that affect, I've noticed. Kind of makes me think the year round sunniness of southern california is partially makes it popular: It keeps the spirits up all year round.

I can't say I've noticed the affect in the past, but I think I've been really noticing it here because I get lots of sun exposure during my breaks, so the difference in effect is noticeable.

Anyway, a valuable skill I've been developing is predicted weekly minimum cash position. This seems to be important if you don't want to go below 0, lol. With the strong sales this week, I may feel like I'm doing great, but then I have to remember what this week's predicted expenses will be, and I realize I'm not doing as great as I would otherwise think. Still a huge improvement over last half july, but still a little uncomfortable, lol. It also gives me a reference point to predict how quickly I'm building savings for durable goods purchases and the like (non-food/gas). The fence purchases really brought the minimum cash position number down, lol. It also makes it a bit easier to understand how other purchases (Like going out to eat) affects my weekly savings accumulation, which should lead to better financial choices. Applying this skill with higher income levels would definitely be advantageous.

I really need to make a point to move some assets. My little generator seems to be keeping up with the orders just fine, which is interesting.

I do have an advantage over my elderly neighbor in that I do have savings. He kind of seems like he's running out and for no obvious reason other than I'm guessing limited income.

Okay, I noticed my auger that now has a pipe coupler on it, is a bit hard to remove. lol

Don't know how it'd be removed. Will keep searching.

Think maybe I could get a short nipple with a hex welded on it so that it'd be removable when needed. Didn't know these pipe couplers weren't designed to removed.

Yep, this is what I think I need:

Would prefer this to the methods mentioned at https://forum.heatinghelp.com/discussion/100077/looking-for-a-good-way-to-loosen-iron-pipe-fittings .

Sheduling a banana pickup for tomorrow morning along with this part.

 

[DAND214]

Swbluto wrote:
"She'd make great children"

Children? You can't park a trailer and you are talking KIDS? Boy are you messed up.

you are so hard to follow, one minute it's food then it's medical issues next were are talking kids and what would you do with them? Put them in a barrel for a house/home? You need to follow the title, build this forest/house with solar, then maybe find a girl that acres about you, not what you have or are.
Only been married for 45 years, I'm sure she would of left me by now IF I had money. It's the person not the rest of the crap you keep posting.

Dan