jdcburg said:
Sorry to hear about your Dad. It can be very difficult. Maybe you could get him evaluated by a good neuro-psychiatrist at a regional Medical Center. With his history of anxiety and a fixation on routines, he could have obsessive-compulsive disorder. With the trauma history, he could have a brain injury or slow bleed. Either or both of those could be causing or compounding his problems. Sometimes medications and/or other therapies can make a dramatic difference. It might be worth a try, if you can get him there - jd
Thank you, I hope so too, I believe the main problems I have witnessed are due to "cross-over" which causes his brain to try and use the damaged part to do it's normal function, and then there is a pause when that part can't, and the new part of the brain kicks in as back-up to perform this same function.
That is what a ex-Air Force trauma surgeon told me that I chanced upon (ok, I don't believe it was by chance, but providence) who has treated many who have suffered brain damage in war.
I agree you are correct and that he needs to see more specialists, the problem is that his "normal" as far as the need for control and anxiety and depression issues were not even treated for close to 30 years, now his "normal" is taking a pill at night that knocks him out, and he goes to bed MUCH earlier than he ever did before, 8PM and he has always had trouble sleeping, so he will often wake up early like 2 - 4 AM and I remember he used to wake me up as a kid on rare occasion and tell me how precious sleep was, and what a gift it was just to be able to sleep well at night.
I think also because he idolized his own father he is blind to some of the obsessive-compulsive things that he is doing now that 10 or so years ago he could see as silly and strange when his father did them, like trying to get multiple uses out of paper coffee filters, cutting up banana peels and putting them in baggies and leaving them all over the kitchen, never actually using them to fertilize the roses as intended, but just storing them up until we finally throw them out because they are too many and unsanitary.
We have a new coffee machine for him we got for his birthday that has a permanent metal filter, but we haven't even set it up yet since it has been so busy, and we know it will be a fight to use it at all since dad values not spending money over just about anything else.
He still has gifts in their packages from years past never opened or used even though the tools he has are falling apart, he wants to hoard the new ones and save them for a future that never comes.
My parent's house is in need of a bathroom remodel that they bought all the supplies to do, but because dad feels too "pressured" to even talk about it, much less do it or even let someone else do it, it doesn't get done.
Sorry for writing a book!
Thanks for listening
Dayn
:lol: :wink:
